NEW YORK – In the wake of several recent allegations of domestic violence involving NFL players, including the Baltimore Ravens’ Ray Rice and Minnesota Vikings’ Adrian Peterson, the league Wednesday unveiled a comprehensive new program aimed at curbing what has come to be seen as excessive expense policy abuse.

“Ray Rice, seen here with his wife Janay, denying accusations he routinely exceeded his set per diem throughout the 2013 – 2014 season.” – (AP Photo)

Speaking at a press conference in New York Wednesday morning, embattled NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell was firm in outlining a broad plan addressing the growing controversy. “We have listened to the public, our fans and our players and believe that in light of these unacceptable cases of violence against both women and children, it’s time we implement a new, comprehensive time & expense policy.” He went on to explain that, given the public’s recent outcry over the NFL’s abject unwillingness to place moral decency ahead of its own profits, the league would no longer reimburse its employees for hand-written taxi receipts, over-budget meals or United premium economy upgrades.

“This ends now. This ends here, with me.” said Goodell in closing. “We will once-and-for-all deliver a vicious upper-cut to these egregious flight, hotel and meal costs.”

NFL Week 4 kicks off Thursday night with the New York Giants taking on the Washington oh god dammit.

“Roger Goodell says words, talks about things with reporters Wednesday.” – (AP Photo)

(L&B)

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